I’m a fan of great design and only recently has this become a priority for cell phone manufactures, luckily the launch of the iPhone changed all that and the boring rectangle phone with no character is soon becoming a thing of the past. However that doesn’t mean that everyone’s tastes are the same and a quick look at what passes as a mobile phone nowadays sure reinforces that theory. So without further ado here are my choices as the Fugliest Cell Phones on the market today.

5. The Nokia 5300 XpressMusic -
The First indication of the fugliness are the color options available to the consumer that include only Lilac and Black. This phone is advertised as the perfect marriage of music and style. I am not sure if it plays music all that well but I beg differ on that next part, I thought they passed a truth in advertisement law that disallowed such blatant misinformation. I mean this looks like someone trying to fit a square peg in a round whole. It looks like to phones stuck together…two ugly phones at that.

4. Samsung T639 aka the stinky phone - Not sure what Samsung was thinking when they decided to make a cell phone that looks like a skunk. Maybe the designer is from France and has a Peppy la Pew cartoon fetish but here in the states we associate skunks with an offensive odor. Maybe I am looking at this the wrong way, perhaps what they were trying for is more of a skid mark stripe down the middle, not sure if that makes it any better or worse…ok probably worse but hey I didn’t design it Samsung did.

3. SideKick Diane von Furstensburg Edition - The scariest part of this model is the fact they paid a designer to make this one look better. I don’t know if she was going for the look of a blown up Kermit the Frog but that was the end result. Hey I am sure this appeals to quite a few people out there, like the Blind!! To be honest I hadn’t heard of Mrs. Von Furstenburg so I had to Google her and what I found out is that she makes dresses, well I for one am encouraging her to stick to that and stay away from anything that someone will actually use more than once.

2. Nokia Vertu aka The Cobra Phone - In what is the most expensive phone on the list and in the world, the $300,000 (not a misprint) cell phone just might be the definition of whats wrong with the world of excess. With one pear cut diamond, one round diamond, two emeralds eyes and 439 rubies one might think this phone is elegant, that is unless you’ve seen that large purple and gold cobra seemingly super glued right on top of the face. With that price tag the possibilities were endless and unfortunately all this phone needs is a swift end to its existence.

1. Nokia 7500 aka The Prism Phone - This is the problem with geometric shapes, some designers tend to get obsessed with them and before long you have something that looks more like a math problem than a mobile phone. I wonder if this was the same guy that was really into triangles on Seinfeld and ended up with a Junior Mint somewhere near his spleen courtesy of Kramer. I think it looks like the middle of a operation gone horribly wrong. The only person that bought this phone lives in Germany is names Klaus and wears rubber pants far too often.